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Looking at the Big Picture: Taking the Emotion Out
For my next installment in the “Big Picture” series, I’m going to talk about Taking the Emotion Out. Now some of you might wonder how this makes any sense at all, as without emotion, we’d all just be like robots. I mean specifically taking NEGATIVE emotions out, that influence your ability to make a rational decision in an argument or otherwise negative situation.
Now you must have noticed that when you’re angry, or sad, you don’t always make the best decisions. That’s because your emotions release adrenaline, or something of the sort, that helps to cloud your judgement. At least that’s how it seems, but I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.
By taking a breath, and making a conscious effort to suppress your anger, or prevent it from boiling over, you will be able to take a better look at whatever the situation might be, thus allowing you to make a better more educated opinion. I’ll be honest, I used to let the anger get the better of me. If I was ticked off, I didn’t make the best decisions. We can all relate.
Then one day, when I was helping a friend deal with a difficult situation, I thought to myself how much the other persons actions were being influenced by anger, and how differently it could have ended if anger wasn’t in the picture. The saying “Blinded by Rage,” is completely accurate. Another very SIMPLE thing, that is often very difficult to put into practice.
So next time you’re feeling like you’re blood is going to boil, take a step back, take a few breaths, and try approaching the situation with a neutral stance. Not only will you be able to see things for what they really are, but you will be able to make a more educated decision as to how to respond to the situation. Yet another way that looking at the Big Picture helps you live a better, more stress free life.
I’m not saying it’s easy to implement though, as we often let our emotions get the best of us, but do your best, and eventually, you will have full control over yourself, which will let you diffuse the problem easier than you ever thought possible. This also helps if the person you’re arguing with is angry too - at least then the problem won’t escalate to something that it never should have become.
So that’s it for this installment - short but to the point right??? 
Until next time, happy blogging!!
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This is so true, I know times in my life that my actions were driven by rage and anger and I said things that did nothing but fueled the fire and once I calmed down and took a step back I could actually resolve the situation, but not until then.
Cheers to looking at the big picture!
Nice post Taris. But i feel that decisions in anger are not right always. Sometimes its better to be cool and calm while taking decisions otherwise we end up taking impulsive decisions.
INdeed that’s what I was trying to get at
Our actions from rage and anger come from our desire to be heard. We feel that out point of view is not coming across and the tension mounts until rational action cease. Stepping back gives us a moment to develop a rational tactic to be heard. Sometimes, being quiet and still produces the theater to be heard, by letting the other person know they are being heard and now it is your turn.
Good insight!!
I agree with BusinessX. Being heard is the root of the adrenaline pusher in most arguments. Also, building up emotion over time on a certain subject that has not bee dealt with can lead to an explosion for sure.
However, one metaphor that I have heard is that your brain is like a pie chart. We would like to think it is filled with mostly logic, but as emotion creeps up, emotion begins to take over the logic and soon enough that is when things go to shit.
With my experience with this certain subject, I would like to relate back to Jason Ks reply to one of the past posts in this thread: that it is good to deal with whatever and put out the fire, or the forest will continue to burn. If things are dealt with asap in a logical way (and not ignored), there is no reason for emotion to get involved, or build up to create an angry situation.
Very good point - definitely agree!!
Accepting we have emotions is first step, the second step is to have a plan beforehand how to deal with them when they arise. Wait until the moment to deal with them, almost assured to do something wrong and long lasting.
Great point!! A plan is key to anything!!
That is all stepping back is, giving yourself a moment to get into a frame of mind to make a plan how to deal with the situation at hand.
Planning is the foremost thing with anything. Infact even with blogging you have to plan. You need to analyse when to post and what to. You can’t post anything without a concrete plan. Atleast i don’t.
Good post Taris
It is very odd but I have learnt what you have said via my dogs. Being stressed and angry gets you nowhere.
Take a few minute and chill and confrint the problem in a calm manner with your thoughts focused and you will reap the rewards, whatever they may be.
Stress is the killer, and the foil of rational thought.
For sure!! Dogs are a great way to learn this, as anger definitely won’t help with a pooch!
They don’t know what made you angry, but they can learn not to do certain “things”. But it must be approached as learning and not a rant.
what i feel is, if someone goes out of bounds or something pains a lot more than what you can handle, just take it out as your anger…
and sometimes I just love it to heights…
I think that’s a great time to have a punching bag handy hehehe
I used to do this before, but the punching bag broke and all sand leaked. No i am serious, but then i use the gloves with the wall
I didnt even know that was possible lol!!
Odd, I never thought about what was in a heavy bag before. Guess I figured it would be special punching bag fill, not something generic like sand. Makes perfect sense now.
No, when i bought the bad, it was empty. I had the option of filling out what i wanted to. First i filled some rags and the sorts, but it didn’t work all that well. Went to the beach, and stuffed sand into it. The bag had all shells and all in it. One fine day the bag broke and all sand poured out. Never mind i thought to myself. I will make do with the gloves
There is a certain euphoria of doing things in the moment. The zone.
I know. I did that all in the josh. But later on never really used it.
I like the Calvin montage. Dealing with emotion he is quite expressive. Never having considered it before, many cartoon characters are not expressive. Charlie Brown comes to mind.
This article is worth reading several times. It is really motivating specially when we loose it at times and go out of control.
“short but to the point right”
There is nothing wrong with short writing, short is good. I like Twain’s quote on the topic- “I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.”
Sometimes you need to write short. It depends on the topic. You cant compress blogging tips, but you can write short stuff about what you ate.